Valentine's Day stories
by SabrinaSelene
Summary: A collection of tales from the various characters and cast of Bungou centering this special day!


**A/N: So I got really into Bungou Stray Dogs the last month or two but haven't written anything on it yet. But Valentine's Day is here so why not take the opportunity, right? XD**

* * *

"Kyouka-chan! Be careful not to hurt yourself!" Atsushi called back as he stumbled through the door carrying a multitude of plastic bags. He placed them on the ground and went back to hold the door for the petite 14-year old.

She walked in easily, holding a single plastic bag. "I'm fine, Atsushi."

Closing the door gently behind her, he then picked up his bags and followed her into the kitchen. It didn't hurt to care about someone. To him, it was like looking after a younger sister. Atsushi smiled happily at the thought.

The two of them sorted out their groceries, placing some in the fridge and some on the table. Atsushi whipped out a piece of paper to put on the kitchen counter. "We need cocoa powder, butter, icing sugar and water."

"All here," Kyouka replied, dipping a finger into the opened container of icing sugar and tasting it.

"Be sure to wash your hands, Kyouka-chan," the older boy chided lightly as he grabbed a pot and filled it with water.

It was a few days to Valentine's Day and it was Kyouka who had shyly suggested the idea of making chocolates for the Armed Detective Agency. Face flushed with excitement, Atsushi had eagerly agreed to it too and thus their grocery shopping this morning for various ingredients.

Atsushi hummed a little song as they worked. He filled a saucepan with water over the stove as Kyouka mixed cocoa powder and butter in a bowl. No one spoke but they didn't really feel the need to. It was a quiet kind of companionship where both parties felt relaxed and at ease; communicating through glances and exchanged smiles.

 _Ah. I have to be careful not to bring the water to a boil._ Atsushi adjusted the fire on the stove before going over to Kyouka who had some difficulty with eliminating some lumps.

Atsushi took the beater from her hand and expertly turned over the cocoa mixture, stirring it with a carefully applied force. Kyouka watched in awe.

"You're actually really good at this."

Although it was a compliment, Atsushi felt a little defeated Kyouka that had probably considered him a poor cook. He poured the mixture into the saucepan.

"Well, we make desserts like this in my orphanage from time to time to fundraise," he explained. "So I know how to cook some …"

Kyouka replied, not mockingly, "but you still can't make an omelette properly."

An arrow flew through Atsushi. "Kyouka-chan …" he clutched at his chest.

"You tend to burn your fried fish too," she continued, "- and your vegetables sometimes get soggy …"

Another stab through the heart. Atsushi found it hard to breathe. "K - Kyouka-chan … when you say it like that -"

Then, an odd smell alerted both Atsushi and Kyouka to a soft bubbling behind them.

"Oh no!" Atsushi turned off the fire immediately. The chocolate! It was -

"Burnt." Kyouka dipped a spoon into the saucepan and observed the coat of brown on the surface.

Everybody makes mistakes right? Take two? Atsushi thought as he scooped out the contents of the saucepan.

Understanding his intentions, Kyouka combined more cocoa powder and butter into the empty bowl and started creaming them again.

 _This time round, I'll watch the flame and make sure it doesn't burn the chocolate._ Atsushi stared at the fire intensely as Kyouka poured the mixture in.

And sure enough, when the saucepan was lifted from the stove, the chocolate mixture was perfect. They both spooned it into a clean bowl and poured the icing sugar in.

Atsushi and Kyouka mixed in the sugar, which turned out to be a rather messy process but that was the fun of it. As they smiled at each other, Atsushi couldn't help but feel it was as if he were in some shoujo manga …

They scooped the contents of the bowl into the moulds and put it in the fridge. Closing it with some finality, Atsushi turned around and gave Kyouka a high-five.

Then, it was time for clean-up.

Kyouka turned to pick up the recipe Atsushi printed on paper that was left on the counter. Just as she was about to crumple it, her eyes caught onto a particular step.

"Atsushi," she reached over and tugged at his sleeve. "We forgot the milk …"

He groaned involuntarily and palmed his forehead.

"I thought you said you had experience!"

Atsushi removed his hand from his face, moving it to scratch the back of his head. He was avoiding Kyouka's gaze. "Well," he started sheepishly, "when I said we made desserts … I was actually the one doing the cleaning and not the actual cooking …"

A momentary silence passed them before Kyouka started to giggle.

It was so uncharacteristic of her that Atsushi looked up in alarm. "What's wrong?"

She touched a finger to his cheek and swiped off a bit of chocolate that had landed there. Kyouka tasted it wordlessly.

"It's sweet," she said finally, smiling to herself.

Atsushi turned red. What just - why would she … _Kyouka-chan?!_

"Let's make some more," she lifted her eyes to meet his. "We'll get it right this time."

Atsushi gulped. "Y - yes!"

He turned around to open the fridge and take out the milk, hiding his burning face. However, despite his embarrassment … he couldn't say it wasn't having fun.

And Atsushi was glad that Kyouka was here right now and having fun with him too.

* * *

It was a lovely Sunday afternoon when the two made plans to visit one of Yokohama's largest shopping malls in the central district. There weren't off-days for detectives, but today was the only exception especially since it was a slow paperwork kind of day.

Handing in their reports early, they bid an annoyed Kunikida (with the absence of Dazai) goodbye and set off.

The mall was filled with families and happy shoppers, milling about and admiring the Valentine's day displays. However, Ranpo refused to get distracted, having only a one track mind at the moment with a very specific aim.

"Everything on display is so typical and boring," he muttered.

Yosano tossed her hair behind her, multiple bags already swinging from her arms. "You're too picky. This isn't his birthday or Christmas -"

"But any gift to Shachou should be special!" Ranpo insisted.

Laughing lightly, the elegant doctor looked at his frowning face. "I could give you ideas if you don't have anything specific in mind?"

"Like what? Lingerie? That's all you've bought."

"And wine too!" She lifted four carefully wrapped bottles as if they weighed no more than a book.

Ranpo pouted in response. "If you've bought wine for Shachou, I can't give him wine too!"

"Then a set of ties?"

"Too formal."

"Lingerie?"

"Too informal ... and besides you've bought -"

"But I'm not gifting them to Shachou."

"No lingerie!"

"How about cuff links?"

"Typical!"

Like this, the pair debated on a suitable gift for the ADA's revered President as they scoured each level of the mall.

In the end, Ranpo declared his exhaustion and decided to head home.

"Are you sure?" Yosano raised an eyebrow at him as they passed a flower shop out of the mall.

Then, she stopped in her tracks and doubled back. Ranpo turned behind and looked at her in confusion.

"What is it?" He approached her, trying to see what she was looking at.

Yosano silently stood in front of the array of flowers that covered the flower shop. Because it was so small, to the extent that it was more of a flower stand really, the multitude of flowers almost covered the counter completely. However, it was still well-kept and tended to. A subtly sweet smell from the blooms gave the impression that they were standing in a meadow of flowers.

It looked like a tiny flower garden in spring, Ranpo thought.

"There, those lilies. Aren't they pretty?" Yosano remarked quietly, startling Ranpo with her tone of voice. He followed her gaze to a vase of lilies in a variety of charming colours. "I think they're beautiful," she continued when he didn't reply.

She looked at Ranpo suddenly, her face lit and voice back to usual. "You could buy some for Shachou!"

"Oh ..." Ranpo stared at her. "Oh right," he turned back to look at the elegant petals. "Yeah I could ..."

Yosano smiled. "Well, it is getting late and you don't have to decide now. We can always come back tomorrow."

"A small bouquet of lilies please!" The shorter detective hastily yelled towards the counter, surprising Yosano.

An elderly lady shuffled to the light. She gave him a kind smile. "Yes, alright. Coming right up."

After receiving his wrapped bouquet, of which he chose to include a lily of a different colour each, Ranpo stalked off immediately as Yosano tagged behind him.

"Why are you giggling like that?" Ranpo asked in mild annoyance as he tried to hold the bouquet as inconspicuously as possible.

"Nothing," she stifled a chuckle. "Just - thank you."

"What for?"

"The flowers."

Huffing a little, Rampo pointedly glanced the other way. "I didn't say they were for you!"

"Ah, alright then," Yosano said, amused. "I'll thank you on behalf of the person receiving your gift then."

Still smiling, she trailed after the haughty and embarrassed boy who had decided to remain silent since her last comment. Yosano thought about the detective stamp set she had handmade for him a few days ago. She hoped he'd enjoy it as much as she would enjoy her aromatic present.

* * *

"Kunikida-kun?" Dazai exclaimed in bewilderment as he sauntered through the door. "What are you still doing here so -"

He gave a small gasp as he leapt sideways to avoid a fast-moving projectile hurled at him. Glancing back, he saw that a fountain pen had smashed into the wall behind him, leaving a blotch of ink on the wallpaper.

"Ah," said Dazai in a more timid tone. "I presume you're making art?"

Crossing the floor in two quick seconds, Kunikida grabbed Dazai by the collar and flung him to the ground.

"Shitty Dazai!" The bespectacled man growled. "I wouldn't still be here if you'd come in during the day to finish your paperwork!"

Dazai eyed another fountain pen Kunikida had in his hand wearily. "I - well … I was feeling unwell -"

The fountain pen came down without warning. It stabbed into the carpeted floor, right beside Dazai's neck, barely missing it. "Careful, Kunikida-kun …" The brunette raised his hands in surrender. "I don't fancy being killed by anyone else unless they're as beautiful as me -"

A fist would have connected with Dazai's jaw if he hadn't rolled away in time. Dodging various flying objects, Dazai ran about the office as Kunikida destroyed it.

"I had to -" he roared, "- sit here all day," a paperweight crashed into the window, "finishing both my paperwork and yours," - this time a lamp broke into smithereens, "while you idle away at home!"

Finally, Kunikida ran out of breath and objects to throw and settled on just glaring daggers at the nimble man. "Why are you here now?" He demanded.

Dazai lifted a first aid kit that was miraculously in one piece. "I ran out of spare, clean bandages and money. But! I remembered the ADA had some and came here to help myself!" He happily opened the kit to take out the roll of white cloth.

"You shitty waste of bandages," Kunikida spat. Then, he glanced at the clock which had now a crack in the glass. It was exactly 11 and he didn't have any more time to while away.

"Oh!" Dazai exclaimed, eyes brightening. "You're sounding more and more like Chuuya every passing day!"

"I'm putting you in charge of the paperwork for the budget needed to repair this place _and_ replace those bandages you took." Kunikida said coldly, adjusting his spectacles before sitting back down at his table amidst the debris.

Dazai's jaw fell open in dismay. "That's unfair, Kunikida-kun ~~"

A sharp glance towards his way however, hushed him. "Next time you disappear, please do so for good."

Dazai clutched at his chest, his voice becoming melodramatic. "Ouch! That hurts, Kunikida-kun! Are you this upset because you don't have a date on Valentine's Day?"

Unfazed, said date-less man in question continued to type; fingers flying through the keyboard. "I don't believe in such as undeserved, inflated occasion."

"Oh?" Dazai's curiosity had been aroused. "Why is that so?"

Kunikida held up his book of ideals while his eyes never left the screen. "According to my ideals, pompous, over-exaggerated occasions like Valentine's Day and Christmas are too commercialised -"

"That's sad, Kunikida-kun. I love Christmas -"

The comment went over the blond's head as he continued speaking. "I firmly believe one needn't set aside a day to specifically show their love towards a significant other. Instead, everyday should be taken as an opportunity to show that love, regardless of whatever occasion or situation it may be."

Dazai blinked at his partner. His face slowly becoming flushed as he clasped his hands together. "Wow ~~ I never knew Kunikida-kun was such a romantic!"

Said romantic in question stiffened his shoulders a little as his typing slowed. "W, well … I just - you know. Sentimentality never goes out of -"

"I'm lying of course," Dazai cut him off. "I've stolen and read your little book multiple times already!"

Kunikida punched a fist into the keyboard. "Why you -"

"But you know!" Dazai ignored the flaming anger that was practically emanating from the other man. "Valentine's Day isn't just about lovers! It can also be a celebration of friendship!"

"And your point is?" Kunikida tapped his finger impatiently.

Dazai grinned. "Why not take the day as a chance to show your appreciation for the people working here? After all, you barely show any sort of warmth or familiarity towards your colleagues who are here everyday …"

"Maybe I could if I wasn't drowning in work all the time!" Kunikida shot him another pointed glare.

Backing off a little, Dazai shrugged. "It's just a suggestion! But I have a feeling doing something thoughtful for everyone once in a while would make them really happy."

"Besides," he said, making his way back to the door. "There's an old superstition that claims you lose less hair the more you make others smile."

Kunikida paused in his frantic typing, only to hurriedly grab a spare fountain pen to quickly jot that down in his book of ideals.

"I'm lying about that too," Dazai whispered loud enough for him to hear as he opened the door.

Once again, another fountain pen was destroyed as it snapped in half in Kunikida's fingers.

"Oh! And before I forget," Dazai added as the thought suddenly came to his mind. "I finished the report you set me to do at home - here it is!" He brought out a stack of papers from within his coat in a flourish.

Kunikida pushed himself up from his chair, boiling with rage. _"You miserable, godforsaken, useless piece of -"_

Dazai fortunately had just slammed the door shut from behind him as a computer crashed into it. He sighed with relief, wiping his brow and started to head home.

Perhaps he should stay home tomorrow as well. Dying prematurely to murder committed by an angry, bespectacled man who didn't believe in Christmas really wasn't the way to go after all.

* * *

It was early. Way too early. Gifting someone something on the 13th of February just didn't have the same impact as gifting someone the same gift tomorrow.

But … but what was she to do? He had a mission tomorrow. He would be out the whole day and she wouldn't get the opportunity.

She supposed, gifting someone a Valentine's Day present a day earlier was better than a day later after all.

Right?

She clutched at the tiny jar with trembling hands. After going to and fro from the supermarket and making several batches … the last one had turned out to be the best. Or so she thought. What if he didn't like it? What if he preferred his chocolate cookies to be darker? She may have put in too much too much sugar.

Biting on a fingernail, she headed to his desk. But she was already here. It wasn't as if she could run home now and make a fresh new batch. It was already 6 in the morning and if she did that, she'd be late for work and …

And there wouldn't be another opportunity like this.

She placed the jar down on the mahogany table. In her anxiety to get the work early today, she had forgotten to wrap it or put it in a bag; instead she had clutched it in her hands all the way to the office. She wondered if it was a bit too plain - she had forgotten to leave a card or a name too …

Then, footsteps sounded from the door and she quickly moved away from the table to her own desk.

A colleague walked in.

"Yo, Higuchi. You're early today!" Tachihara yawned as he came into the office.

"Good morning," she replied quietly. "You're early too."

He waved a file at her and headed towards the mahogany desk. "Just came in to submit yesterday's mission -" He stopped short midway in his sentence as he placed the file down on the table. His eyes drawn to the tiny cookie jar, shaped like a heart.

"Since when did he have this?" Tachihara picked it up in amusement, inspecting it in the light.

Higuchi felt more glad than anything that she didn't leave a card or a name. "I'm not sure …"

Tachihara raised an eyebrow at her. "Really? You're always stalking A -"

"I don't know when he got that," Higuchi said curtly. "Leave it."

The redhead let out a low whistle. "You know, you can be real scary at times … especially when it comes to _him._ " He set the jar back down the table.

He gave the file containing the mission report a pat before turning to let himself out of the room. "If I didn't know better," he said as he walked away. "I might've thought you had a crush on him."

Higuchi stood frozen in the room, a million thoughts running through her head. Feeling her cheeks warm, she hurriedly busied herself with organising things. It was therapeutic and it calmed her down a little.

At half-past 7, a slim figure cloaked in black walked into the office, causing her heart to stop momentarily. Then, remembering herself, she stood facing him.

"Good morning, Akutagawa-senpai."

He headed to his desk and flicked a speck of dust from the table, coughing. He gave a nod in her direction. "Morning," he said tonelessly.

Higuchi watched as his eyes found the thin file containing Tachihara's mission report. "That's -"

"Yesterday's mission report," Akutagawa finished. "I know."

His slender fingers brushed across the file as his eyes continued to travel to the glass jar beside it. His solemn expression faltered momentarily.

"What is this?" He asked, picking it up. "I don't think Tachihara put this here too."

Higuchi could feel her heartbeat accelerating at an alarming speed. "N - no … he didn't."

Akutagawa gave her a quick glance before looking back at the jar. Higuchi hoped she appeared calm and composed outwardly even though she was practically self-destructing on the inside.

"Do you know who left it?"

 _It was me!_ A voice in her head screamed. But of course, Akutagawa couldn't hear it. Higuchi clenched her fists. "A, actually -" she started in a trembling voice.

Then, the door burst open causing her to jump. It was Tachihara clutching a piece of paper in his hand.

" _Knock,_ you idiot," hissed Akutagawa.

"Sorry, I thought you weren't in yet, senpai" Tachihara said lightly, walking over to hand him the piece of paper. "I forgot to file in this page, accidentally left it out."

Akutagawa realised he was still holding the jar and quickly set it down to take the paper from the other male.

"Cool cookie jar," Tachihara snickered. Noticing Akutagawa's expression had darkened, he quickly backed away. "Ah - I did not mean to … I'm sorry Akutagawa-san. H, have a nice day," he stammered before hastily leaving.

Higuchi was dying inside. After the interruption, Akutagawa was now busying himself with reading the report and scribbling notes. There was no way she could bring up the cookie jar now. Forcing herself to turn back to her own work, she made occasional glances at her senior who continued to diligently work at his desk in silence.

With people entering and leaving the office as well as Higuchi having to ensure a steady supply of tea in Akutagawa's cup, it was impossible to find the right moment for her to tell him about her gift.

By the end of the day, Higuchi just felt defeated. As she and Akutagawa packed up, she thought about just letting it go. Besides, her senior hadn't even looked at the jar once since the morning. It was just kind of … left there …

She waited for Akutagawa to finish packing and watched as he hesitated, then picked up her cookie jar. Shocked, she made a gasp which she tried to stifle not so successfully.

With his back turned towards her, he spoke. "You made this, didn't you?"

Higuchi's hands tightened around each other as she herself hesitated. "I - well … y, yes …"

Tension thick in the air, Akutagawa turned around slowly as he began to unscrew the lid of the jar. The sun was already setting and it was difficult to make out his face. But, she could see his silhouette taking out a crumbly cookie from inside and biting into it.

The orange glow that bathed the room seemed to intensify as Higuchi's heart drummed violently against her chest.

With a second bite, Akutagawa had finished the cookie wordlessly as she continued to stand there, now quivering slightly from embarrassment and nervousness.

She didn't see his lips part or his expression but Higuchi ears made out a whisper in the silence.

"It's good."

It was hard to explain, even to herself what happened next. She only knew she had almost collapsed to the floor as Akutagawa strode past her out of the door without any other comment or elaboration.

Higuchi ran out quickly, and before she lost courage, called after him in elation and relief.

"Thank you, senpai!"

* * *

Valentine's Day at the Armed Detective Agency wasn't anything too special. It's not like they had any decorations up or a party with tons of food or alcohol.

Kenji mused to himself while going up the steps to the office. Understanding all these holidays and occasions city dwellers celebrate had been confusing at first ... but he was starting to get the hang of it. Valentine's Day seemed to be more of a couple's day and less celebrated at the ADA than ...

Opening the door to the office, Kenji nearly collided with Atsushi who was being chased by Yosano with frilly lace in her hands.

"Just _once_ , Atsushi! I promise, it's not that bad!" She laughed almost evilly as she waved about a delicate piece of frilly dress.

Entering the room, Kenji smiled as he took in the sight of everyone. Shachou was serving them cupcakes with Naomi and Haruno-san's help. Ranpo was encouraging Kyouka-chan to feed him what seemed to be her own homemade chocolate. Tanizaki was slightly tipsy on a bottle of wine that had a peeling label on it that read "Love from Yosano." Dazai had received a beautifully made card from Kunikida and was now hugging - well, sexually harrassing him ...

But everyone looked like they were having fun.

Kenji chuckled to himself, everyday was just as lively as this and he was more than glad he belonged to this company, surrounded by his friends.

"Guys~~" he called out. "Guys! I brought something!"

Finally, everyone looked at him, realising his presence in the room.

"Kenji-kun!" Tanizaki stopped his drunk disco-dancing.

Kenji was mildly surprised that he was able to recognise him in his stupor but continued anyway. "I got this from the market!"

He pulled out a bonsai tree from the brown packaging he was carrying. It was about the size of his torso and potted in stone.

Everyone oohed and aahed as they came forward to take a closer look. Even Atsushi and Yosano who had returned were distracted from their intentions with the tiny tree, trunk intricately curving and leaves a radiant, lush green. Kenji turned the rectangular pot in his hands around to show his fellow friends an engraving.

Etched on the shiny black and grey-freckled surface of the stone was "ADA" enclosed in a heart.

"Did you carve that yourself, Kenji-kun?" The President asked.

The blond nodded. "I did! I do love everyone here, after all ..." he said honestly. "So this is my gift to everyone this Valentine's Day!"

As soon as those words left his mouth, Kenji was soon engulfed by the tsunami that were his friends.

"Aww! Kenji-kun!"

"Kenji, you're so sweet~~"

"Try on this lingerie, Kenji!"

"Yosano-sensei ..."

"Ohho? Then you'll do it for him, Atsushi-kun?"

Laughing gaily, he accepted everyone's hugs and returned them with as much love as he could give. Yes, the countryside may be where he came from, but the ADA here in Yokohama, was his home too.

* * *

Fukuzawa walked into his office, sleeves billowing behind him. As he entered, he froze ...

Because there was literally no floor he could walk on.

Stacks of chocolates, giant bouquets of flowers, soft toys and cookies greeted him when he entered. It was strewn everywhere. It covered every available inch of the table and spilled on to the floor when there was no room left.

However, these gifts weren't just for him, some were from clients whom the ADA had helped and wanted to show their thanks.

Slowly, but not the least bit grudgingly, Fukuzawa sorted out the presents, putting them in neat piles. Some gifts were specifically addressed to certain members of the ADA and he carried those in his arms as he walked out to hand them to his employees.

"Thank you, Shachou," Kunikida bowed stiffly as he accepted his gifts.

A box of chocolates was left in his hands. "Has anyone seen Tanizaki?" Fukuzawa inquired, looking around.

Naomi who was sitting atop his desk looked upset, and answered him in an annoyed tone. "Nii-sama has gone to run an errand he forgot about," there was a pause before she cried out, "and we were supposed to go out on a date noooww!"

"Oi!" Kunikida said harshly. "This isn't the place where you can just -"

"It's alright, Kunikida," Fukuzawa said, resting a hand on his shoulder.

"Maybe Tanizaki-san will find some way to make it up to you!" Kenji tried to comfort the distraught girl.

Fukuzawa was in deep thought. He didn't send Tanizaki out on any missions lately ... nor did he give him an errand to run.

"Don't be too hard on him, Naomi," Fukuzawa spoke finally, his rumbling voice filling the room and stopping her crying instantly. "He may have his own reasons."

Later that night, after work, Naomi trudged her way home. It was turning out to be a very disappointing Valentine's Day. Her brother hadn't answered any of her calls or texts and she hadn't any clue as to when he would return home.

She took out the keys from her bag to unlock the door, only to find it already unlocked. Frowning, and turned the handle slowly and popped her head in.

The hallway was still dark but she could see a light that came from the dining area. She heard the clanking of some metal and water running.

Did someone break in?

With one hand on her cellphone and another on a taser, she stalked forward silently, rounding the corner ...

Only to find her own brother in an apron carrying two plates in his hands to the dining table.

"Naomi!" He jumped at her sight, almost dropping the plates.

"Nii-sama?" She stared in bewilderment. Then her eyes settled on the dining table where she saw a new cloth had been laid out, with roasted chicken, salad, fries and other side dishes set in the middle. There was also a vase of fresh flowers at the end to complete the look.

Realisation dawned upon her as her eyes brightened with tears.

"Oh! Nii-sama!" She leapt forward to sweep her brother up in a passionate hug.

Stumbling a little, Tanizaki tried not to drop the plates he was holding.

He laughed a little, "N - Naomi-chan. I didn't expect you to be back yet - ah! Be careful, I'm - hah - I'm holding plates."

"But how could I concentrate at work if I thought you had blown off our date?" Naomi ran her fingers up and down his sides punishingly. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"Na - Naomi-chan!" Tanizaki shook and tried to speak with effort. "I, I wanted to surprise you - ah! And you know, home-cooked - _hng_ \- f, food is better than some cafe ..."

Naomi continued to torture her brother, fingers never letting up. "You're soooo mean though! You never even answered -"

The plates crashed onto the floor just then. They broke into pieces and Tanizaki cried in dismay.

"Those were china ..."

Naomi rolled her eyes and suddenly shoved her brother back towards the kitchen. Caught off guard, he stumbled, slipped and landed on the floor, his sister atop of him.

"Nevermind those," she smiled, playfully fingering the edge of his shirt under his apron. "Can I have you for dinner instead?"

* * *

Chuuya's hands tightened on the small butterfly knife behind his back. He wasn't informed he was going to receive a package. So why is the postman outside in the evening, ringing his doorbell right now, holding one?

Port Mafia members nowadays rarely send mail anyways, and if they do, they do it through emails or letters handed to the person at office. No one would send mail, let alone a package through the local mailing service. It was too risky and way too slow.

So if it wasn't from the Port Mafia, then who could it be from? Family? But he had none … not anymore anyways.

On the fifth consecutive ring, Chuuya unlocked the door, opening it slightly ajar. "Yes?"

"Umm," the postman said, awkwardly holding out an uneven parcel messily wrapped in brown paper. "You - you're Nakahara Chuuya?" He read his name on a form.

Chuuya hesitated. "Yes …"

"You've got a package and -" the postman looked at the gap in the door strangely, wondering why he wasn't showing his face. "Uhh … you need to sign here …"

The redhead clicked a ballpoint pen and reached out an arm to sign on the form the other man was holding out. Then, he hurriedly took the package and slammed the door shut before the postman could say another word.

Chuuya carried the lumpy parcel to the living cautiously. Okay, so it wasn't a bomb since it was so light. But, it could be coated with poison. Good thing he was wearing his gloves. He turned it over on the coffee table suspiciously, poking and squeezing the package. It was about the size of a standard book and oddly soft. It didn't seem to contain any sharp objects or shrapnel.

He took a deep breath and tore at the tape holding the brown paper together with his knife. Chuuya unwrapped it slowly, anticipating at any moment for something to blow or attack him. He was fully prepared to destroy whatever that was inside in less than a second. Finally, the brown packaging fell apart to reveal …

An ochre-furred, fluffy teddy bear.

"Hah?" Chuuya couldn't help but let out a sound of skeptical astonishment. Somehow, this stuffed toy was really infuriating him … even though all it was doing was sitting on his coffee table looking entirely harmless.

However, the bear was holding a puffy heart in its arms that had the words "I love you beary much" embroidered on it. This irked Chuuya even more.

He picked up the bear and noted that there was something solid within the heart. Squeezing it, a voice crackled out, shocking him.

"Ah Chuuya ~~" It sang, the voice grating on his ears like nails on a chalkboard.

Chuuya threw the bear to the floor in frustration. He should have known …

"How's my lil' petite mafioso doing on V-day? Found anyone yet that isn't non-living or made of cloth or embellished with ribbons and flowers to be worn on the head?"

He cursed colourfully at the bear. When will his suffering end?

"I guess not, huh? You know, time is ticking out and soon you'll be all wrinkly and grumpy and alone … Ah! Oh wait, I guess nothing would have changed."

Chuuya gripped his knife, descending on the bear like a Grim Reaper to the dying.

"You know, even Akutagawa-kun's got that beautiful but daft assistant by his side."

He raised his knife, shaking with pure, undiluted wrath.

"But what'chu got?"

The knife came down so fast and hard, it pierced right through the center of the bear and even through the floor. He had probably cracked it but Chuuya didn't care. He relished looking at the sight of the bear with a knife dead center in it and cotton spilling out. A small sense of satisfaction came to him.

Chuuya whipped around, and if he had his cloak on at the moment, it would be cracking sharply behind him. He headed to his room. He was going to take a long, hot shower and erase his vexation with the stain on all of humanity that was his shitty ex-partner.

Upon reaching his room, he gasped as he saw a single red rose lying on the bed. Perplexed, he approached it and picked it up. There was a note attached to the stem.

Written in an all too familiar writing, it read: You got me.

Chuuya let out a string of curses in 3 different languages that would have made even the most uncouth terrified. Without even pausing to contemplate how the rose could have gotten into his room, Chuuya grabbed his lighter from his pocket and lit the rose up in fire.

"I DON'T NEED YOU SHITTY DAZAAAAAIII!" He screamed in fury as he hurled the burning flower out of an open bedroom window.

He could hear a car skidding across the road before crashing as someone shrieked. Chuuya shut the windows and went into the shower, listening to the blaring horns and shouts from outside his apartment.

It was the most soothing thing he'd heard all day.

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! I hope you're spending this day with loved ones and friends! I enjoyed writing this fic even though it started off slow. However, it soon picked up momentum and I'm glad I finished it! (I left Chuuya's Valentine's Day story for the last because to be honest, I love Soukoku so much. It's my absolute weakness. XD) Anyway, I hope everyone enjoys this little oneshot! Thank you for reading!**


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